Friday, November 11, 2005

Dreams and experience

I've been having the strangest dreams. Last night I dreamed I was riding a giant (three stories tall) camel through a forest searching for beetles. I mean--what?

I was emailing Nathan about the strange dreams I have been experiencing. He noted the gap yesterday, when I couldn't remember any of them. I tried to explain to him about how when I wake up in the morning, if I'm having a dream I don't want to remember for some reason, I can turn my head a certain way and feel the dream tip out of my consciousness and go into another part of my brain. It isn't that the dream is lost when I do that--it's more like it's recycled, and I know bits of it will show up in another dream somewhere; pieces of imagery or mood will show up and I'll remember within the dream that this was part of another dream I made myself forget because it was too scary or raw or painful or even too beautiful to stand. And I thought when I was writing all that out to Nathan, boy, that's really kind of strange, that tipping my head to forget it business, so I wrote that too, but he wrote back and said he does something similar, so I feel less freakish about it and more interested in the whole phenomenon. Does anyone else do anything like that? Force yourself to forget something by taking a physical action?

I re-watched the first disc of the Haibane Renmei series last night. I love to watch something for the second time. Two times is often as frequently as I will watch or read something, but the second time, it's like adding a layer that is comprised only of filled-in gaps in my knowledge to the first layer's gaps. Like snapping legos together. It makes my experience whole. I wonder how it is that people always seem to know so much more after one read or viewing of a book or film than I seem to. I pick up on things that they miss but that apparently aren't essential to plot, or story--details. Little details. I can't see the whole picture and I often think there's something wrong with me because of that. I catch on slower.

I've been having trouble sleeping and so last night I did some yoga at about 11:30 before I went to bed, thinking it would make it easier for me to sleep. I came out of the bridge and went into the forward bend and just fell into it, into that hard, strong hamstring-calf-lower back stretch, and I stayed there for some time that time forgot, just feeling it. It felt great. But when I went to bed, I still couldn't fall asleep. Maybe tonight.

M is getting his motorcycle tomorrow. As long as the dent I put in his bumper when I borrowed his truck when I got a flat tire doesn't prevent him from using the trailer hitch, which he is concerned about. No word yet on the road patrol promotion--he said it will probably be a few weeks.

I just ate some sort of veggie wrap thing and it has given me atrociously bad breath. Be glad you are reading this and not hearing me speak it.


At November 11, 2005 3:46 PM, Blogger suleyman said...

I can't force myself to forget through physical action, but I can help myself to remember. When I want to remember something that has escaped into the depths (or shallows, depending on how you look at it) of my mind, I place my thumbs and forefingers on my forehead like I'm getting ready to draw two strings from my brain.

I have only watched Haibane eps 1-4 once. You're making me look bad :)

I like that one move where you balance on your shoulders and hold your legs straight up. If that is even a move. I may just be doing some weird thing that has no name.

They're still working on the smell-o-internet technology.


At November 11, 2005 4:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I use my prior evening (or any previous) dreams to help me fall asleep. If I replay the dream I'm usually out for a couple hours. -Hu

At November 11, 2005 4:37 PM, Blogger Jenelle said...

When I can't sleep I do sit-ups and push ups. It is usually just the thing that does the trick.

I don't have to do anything to forget stuff...that happens on it's own naturally and it is also the reason I can watch movies and re-read good books over and over. God punished me with a horrible memory...

At November 11, 2005 4:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i actually get sore from yoga, thats how sad my flexibility is :)

At November 11, 2005 5:18 PM, Blogger Sorted Lives said...

3 dirty martinis, 2 glasses of cab, and a martini chaser does the trick for me -- try it sometime, I know I always feel fabulous the next morning....

At November 12, 2005 8:08 AM, Anonymous Allan said...

My experience with dreams is remarkably similar to yours.

When I wake from a dream, I usually do try to put it away somewhere, since my dreams are always weird.

But bits and pieces of those stashed dreams get recycled another night.

I've had essentially the same dream the past 5 nights. And frankly, I would just as soon not dream it again.

At November 12, 2005 2:40 PM, Blogger Greg said...

I can't force myself to forget a dream, but I do know that I can actively think and change the course of it, as well as wake myself up should I feel the need.

Word verifiy: xxbhsaoa

(Where do they come up with these things?!)

At November 12, 2005 6:44 PM, Blogger HM said...

It would be fun to ride a giant camel. I'm still jealous of your dreams. If I ever remembered mine maybe I'd have a head turning trick too, but I don't. There's something wrong with my dreaming mechanism.

A lot of people I know have been telling me they can't sleep lately. Maybe it's the time of year or the funky weather or something.

At November 13, 2005 7:54 AM, Blogger Justin said...


I love the way you write. I want to read lots, lots, lots more of it, and then sit around and remember parts of it afterwards. I think I will.

Just spent the last hour looking at your Flickr photos with my wife sitting next to me...we were both moved...particularly by your nature photos. Thank you.

You like to write. I like to write. I like to read what you write. We went to college together. We both live in Cincy. We should drink coffee together soon.


At November 13, 2005 9:34 AM, Blogger Indigo said...

Sorry you are having such a hard time sleeping. Have you tried melatonin? It works for my Hubby.

How is NaNo going?

At November 13, 2005 11:01 AM, Blogger Tay Hota said...

my sleep cycles have been shite lately as well... the boy and I were up late two fridays ago, too much alcohol, inspired sexual adventure led us to lay and stare at the ceiling all night. I've been off ever since.

Most of my remembered dreams lately have been about him cheating on me. I'm resisting the urge to assume it's true, am reminding myself that characters in dreams are said to represent pieces of the dreamer. So you are the camel, the rider and the beetle... ummm.. dunno, did you catch any beetles? Are you too analytical of the small aspects of your life? Not analytical enough? I interpret them best right after they've happened, just based on my emotional state and feelings about possibilities.. oh god, blabber on why don't you.. bye...

At November 13, 2005 7:40 PM, Blogger d.K. said...

Not being able to sleep is awful... I used to have that problem, but sleep like a baby these days (though I still get up at the crack of dawn...)
I love your new graphic and the colors. I'll have to take Justin's (above) advice and check out what's new in your Flickr gallery.

At November 14, 2005 12:30 AM, Anonymous Fitèna said...

When am too tired I have trouble sleeping, when am too rested I don't feel sleepy. Keeping a balance etween these two states is hard believe me. Am trying chinese tea now. Don't know if it'll work.

Hey, I remember memtionning the turn your-position-in-sleep-and-forget-dream syndrome about one of your posts. A couple of weeks ago I think. I know about it. its sometthings my dad told me about whichhis mum told him about. I don't know if its got any scientific explanation though. But I often have a sens of dejà vu in real life and then realise i might have dreamt about such an such thing.


At November 16, 2005 6:17 AM, Blogger Spenceman said...

I´ve had a little trouble sleeping too and have had the strangest dreams the past few days. I don´t know whether it´s because I´m still getting used to a foreign country or what, but the other night I dreamed I was playing basketball in a gym with Tom Hanks, then at a street court with Jon Stewart, and then I walked down that same street and met Lewis Black while he was doing standup. Am I crazy or just starved my daily dose of the Daily Show?

You ever have that feeling when you´re dreaming that you´re cognizant that it´s all just a dream? I think I might have the other night...I can´t describe it but the overall sensation was enough to make me remember when I´m not used to remembering dreams at all...


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