Ties

That ex of mine that I spent so much time bitching about over the summer when I was doing that book index for her called me today and asked me to be the executor of her will. I've never been the executor of somebody's will before. It makes me feel all grown-up and like I should be much more mature than I am. But I told her I would be honored. She has a very strange (bad) family situation and the person who was previously executor of her will won't even talk to her anymore, so she said she was updating it and needed someone she could trust and who knew her well and would know what she wanted, and that I was that person. It is strange to think that I've known her for about ten years now and that the relationship we have to one another has evolved through such strange, strange channels to lead to this. I mean, a will, you know, it's the essence of what you don't want to think about. But what you really must think about.

It also made me think about the plight of those less fortunate than I am in terms of family. I try my damndest not to take what I have for granted, but sometimes I forget. Today made me remember not to forget. Even though I am mad at my brother, I still love his guts and would lay down my life for him, and I know the reverse is true too. And I am so lucky to have that. So lucky that I'm getting a little teary writing this.

On the note of family, my mom and her three remaining brothers are meeting on Wednesday to talk about what to do about my grandmother, whose health continues to decline. I didn't realize that my mom was sick this weekend, even though I saw her twice, and I feel terrible about it. She looked okay both times I saw her but she mentioned in an email today that she'd spent five hours on Saturday dealing with my grandmother's issues (taking her to the chiropractor, making her lunch, pushing her around the grocery store in a wheelchair, getting her prescriptions, etc.) and that she thought that was what had made her feel run-down. My grandmother is less than five feet tall and weighs more than 250 pounds. She also doesn't have a lot in the way of content filters on what comes out her mouth. She also is not, God love her, the sharpest tool in the shed. My mother is a complete saint for doing all she does for her mother and I am continuously overwhelmed and awed by my mother's devotion to her mother and to doing right by her mother, even though her mother is a cranky ol' overweight biddy who doesn't always see the strain she puts on those around her and is very, very adept at the guilt game. I know that if my mother becomes old and decrepit and needs in-home care that I will take her into my home in an instant and care for her until the day she dies or needs help beyond what I can do for her, but the thing is, it's so incredibly easy to love my mother. She is so loving and thoughtful and compassionate and has such a good heart. The fact that she does the things I would do for her, for this crazy old lady who is her mother, is so moving to me. My mother makes me know that if there's a God up there, God is surely a woman.