The train to doofusville

Actual line in an email I received today, explaining the different types of attack females use on males they want to date:

• Not to interrupt this exciting banter or anything but I am literally taking a crap right now while writing this. I love my laptop and its ability to adapt to my lifestyle.
  

Also, actual conversation I overheard between our two receptionists as I walked by to steal leftover meeting food out of the kitchen:

• (Q:) What's the name of that guy who played that dude in that movie? (A:) Uh, you're going to have to be a little more specific.
  

Why the tar will my picture uploader not work? Stoopid.